i have a thing for good espresso as i have mentioned before. when i used to run a coffee shop a friend of a friend offered to help me with whatever i needed. he ran a shop downtown vancouver called Paradise Cafe. anyhow, he showed me the correct way to pull shots and introduced me to an awesome place called Lava Java in Ridgefield Wa. the owner actually won fourth place in a national barista competition a few years ago.  those guys that worked there knew what they were doing and it was so amazing! it takes a lot of effort and know-how to pull good shots and my equipment that i was using at the time was old and caused the shots to be bitter. besides the fact our grinders werent very good either and we were still learning the techniques to have delicous crema! anyways, so ever since then i am rarely satisfied with most coffee shops or church espresso bars for that matter. once you taste a really good cup, it kind of ruins you! unless you are the kind of person (my sister) who needs equal parts sugar and milk in her coffee (= then it really doesnt matter either way!

we started going to a church down town olympia recently and i noticed they had an espresso bar. i was reluctant to even bother ordering something for fear i would be disgusted. but i gave it a whirl anyhow... oh my goodness the first sip and i was in love! so i went up to the guy in charge and asked him if he worked at a shop around town and where i could get a yummy cup up coffee! he is great and told me of some worth while shops around. so at least every sunday i can have my latte and only pay a dollar for it too. they just have a donation suggestion box. but i give two bucks since it is so good and i would have paid like 3 bucks anywhere else for something half as good. and it is for the church so why not (= i would love to volunteer at the espresso bar at church too so i talked to him about that too. what a great way to get to know people and have fun making espresso again. 

all that to say.... we have been considering buying an espresso machine for our home. i mean what other time in our lives will we be getting like 2000 bucks from the government??! we want to buy stuff we might not buy otherwise and that would be useful.

some days i really could use a cup of coffee and also when we have people over or parties i would love to serve it. but we found out that a good machine costs at least 300 bucks.... so ummm no. but i dont want to pay 10 bucks a week going thru drive thrus all the time. so i thought ok well maybe we can buy a coffee pot, at least to get some caffeine. sure it wont taste good, but i need something. but they cost 25 bucks or more plus a grinder and then buying the coffee... i just dont like drip coffee enough to waste money on that. man i am a cheapskate! so i ended up buying a jar of instant coffee for four dollars. isnt that hillarious! i go from being a coffee snob to resorting to instant coffee the nastiest way to drink it ever! but this way i am not expecting a latte that is good, so i am not disappointed. but i found a good way to enjoy it.

i like it strong, so you might not want to try this at home (=

8 ounces of milk hot

2 heaping teaspoons coffee

1 tsp cocoa powder

splash of almond extract

2 tsp honey 

This weekend there was an Arts Walk in Olympia. Lots of local artists display their artwork throughout the town in local businesses. a few streets are blocked off and there is a parade at the latter part of the afternoon. Our church is downtown so it was a part of it too. I found out about this one sunday morning while at church and of course was very excited. i thought maybe i could put a few things to display of my own. but i found out about it not even two weeks before it was going to happen. i had hopes that i could finish a couple projects that i had started recently, but there just wasnt enough time to get them into the show. there are two or three a year so i will definitely be putting some new stuff up next time.

Justin and i went downtown olympia to check it out and it was neat. we had lunch first at mcmenamins and it was so yummy! then just meandered around and talked to a few of the local artists there who had some stuff out that i really enjoyed. here are their sites if you want to see them.

laurie stone

joanne osband

 I have been working on a lot of crafty things here since we moved in. (i have not done any drawing of people since my entry about that, but still am going to. but i am caught up with other creative things)  trying to get the house decorated how i want it. i like to make most my decor or at least tweek things i buy just a little. so i have six projects that i have made a deadline for. June !st is Valens first birthday party so i am shooting for that day. i get so sidetracked and start other projects before i finish another. i think it is because i get a great idea and so i start it a little, but then i get another idea and so i get excited about starting that one too.... and so on. so right now i have quite a few half or nearly half done art projects sitting on the counter... well until this afternoon when i put them in the closet. this is why i need my own craft room, otherwise the whole house turns into my very own craft room (= so i am working on this weakness. Trying to prioritize my projects and make some sort of system. maybe even use a planner.... who would have thought i could do that? i like the idea, but it never works for me. maybe this time it will. i usually just jot things down on random pieces of paper all over the place. i dont know why i dont use just one piece and keep it all together, i really dont understand myself. so ive got a stack of papers with lots of scribbles, now i just need to sit down and write it all out in an organized fashion.

so expect some new pictures of our house (finally) in june. at least i am hoping to have the dining and living areas done. i really have so much fun doing this and i love being in my home when i am surrounded by things that ive created, it feels warm and inspiring and my personality comes through and that is cool.  i like to live in a fun environment with lots of uniqueness.

all of this is only possible because valen turned a corner a month or so ago and i have more time and energy to do stuff. so that might be part of the reason i am running a hundred miles an hour in my head and cant seem to catch myself. i havent done much since he was born, so there is a lot bottled up. hooray! i am so excited for tomorrow! actually tomorrow i am going to work on a couple purses for myself, and that has nothing to do with decorating the house oops (=.... but i am going to get on track on monday i promise (=

phew that was a close one! for a few days there we thought we were pregnant. I was almost sure that it wasn't possible, but the more i thought about it the more unsure i became. those were some stressful days, let me tell ya.

before we even had valen, justin and i were pretty sure that two children would be enough for us. i never really wanted kids till shortly before i was married so it isnt really that surprising that two is plenty right now. so at the thought of being pregnant i was a bit overwhelmed. i started worrying about everything that i could, for instance, how in the world are we going to afford this one? we dont have insurance for me right now at all... that would be expensive unless we gave birth at home, which i actually would be all for except for the fact that my last two births were bad back labor and i really dont want to go through that again so i would consider an epidural. so that means i would need to be in a hospital. anyways, other things like, how will i take care of my two small children when i am sick with morning sickness? how will i function once the new baby comes without getting sleep, how will we afford an suv? oh my and the list went on until my vision started to blur and i nearly went into hysteria. so i stopped. stopped thinking about all the frustrating things that could happen and prayed. and not so long after i started thinking of all the wonderful things about my life and how beautiful my children are and how special and perfect and how blessed i am and how owing 15,000 bucks for medical bills wouldnt be the END of the world and how situations that seem impossible are usually not as bad once you get into them... and no one ever died from having three kids in a row (well not just because of that fact alone)  so i started realizing that even though it wasnt what we wanted or could really see ourselves dealing with, i knew that everything was going to be ok and i just needed to stop worrying and enjoy life.

so for the next few days we were both so confused at what my body was doing. trying to prepare ourselves for possibly another baby but at the same time thinking of how we were going to spend our government stimulus moola (= and having a baby would mean no fun and games with that dough )= the cool thing was that for the first time since valen was born i felt peace about having another baby and didnt feel like my world was going to crumble. my whole perspective seemed different and i was very optimistic. those days made me really count my blessings and appreciate my life the way it was and not be so anxious for something else but to be content just being a mom right now and putting aside my selfish needs to do something else with my time ever since then i have had a lot more energy and been much more creative and purposeful with my time. i guess i had been just sort of in a slump since valen came. he has been so much work, not such an easy baby as we were hoping for. and since both dahlia and him are so little it makes my days long and exhausting... i have never really been content with sitting at home and just being a mom. i had tried to deal with that but i still couldnt be happy and not feel stuck. my heart was somehow longing for some other life and resisting what was reality. but somehow seeing the other life i could be having and how much time i would not have,  really helped me appreciate the freedom i do have and realize what a bump on a log i had been. i had also felt a bit distant from God, really since about the time i gave birth to dahlia, ive been really frustrated and in a dry season i guess.... and it was hard. not to mention just after giving birth can be hard on its own... so the past 2 years have been kind of empty and draining and lots of questioning. but i feel like God has shown his face once again to me and i can see clearly again. like my heart has been renewed and my joy has returned. i dont think it was really about being pregnant but God was able to use those few days to do something inside me and i am very grateful for that! so when we figured out that i was indeed NOT pregnant, there was a bit of rejoicing! even though God had prepared my heart for the opposite, i was very relieved at the same time. since this happened, justin and i both see things a bit differently and are excited to be where we are right now and not get discouraged by the mundane.