i had my second appointment with my midwife today. mostly just paperwork and discussing previous health and births. she also listened for the heartbeat! and it was there, pounding about 150 beats per minute! perfect! that was such a great feeling (: then she took my blood pressure and it was 80/35!! in the past it has always been around 120/65 or so. but honestly i wasnt that shocked to hear this. i have been extremely faint-ish (i know that isnt a word) all of the time in this pregnancy! doesnt even matter if i have just eaten or not, i am constantly feeling fatigued and very tired and dizzy. i just thought i wasnt eating enough, but that wasnt the only reason. so it made sense to me. it is frustrating going out and running errands or standing very long, i get light headed very easily and do not feel well. even if i eat something healthy, it is challenging. but i read this is common in the early stages of pregnancy so lets hope so!

also we went over what i have been eating, and i knew before she even said anything what i should be doing differently, but it is so hard in this trimester, which is almost over!!! spinach makes me want to puke and i can only handle a small portion of salad if any at all.... it ends up going bad in our fridge so i just havent been buying any since becoming pregnant. and im not getting enough whole grains. i probably only eat 4 servings a day, and i want more than that but it seems so hard. you would probably think that carbs would be the easiest thing to get down right now, but not so. she suggested eating more brown rice and quinoa, which i have in the cupboard but never feel like making. but i did tonight, gosh its so easy... it just seems like a lot of work, but it wasnt at all! and i thoroughly enjoyed my meal unlike most nights!  and breakfast she suggested eating something with more protein, but again, eating anything in the morning is near torture..... soon oh very soon i should be back to normal! well close to normal!! 

justin surprised me with the afternoon off thursday so that we could go for lunch and spend some time together. the weather was beautiful and he chose a restaurant and i didnt know where we were going till we parked. it was great! a little italian place downtown that we have been wanting to try, but it is really expensive. lunch menus are always a bit cheaper though, so we were able to get out of there around 30 bucks, and we used some christmas money! after lunch we walked around a bit then hit up a local coffee shop before we went home. it was such a nice day. i loved being surprised! and the coffee at the end made it perfect! i forgot to take a picture at the restaurant, but here is one of us on our date together.

i feel more content in life right now than i can remember ever being. life has completely gone in a different direction than i would have thought when i was younger, but i am glad it didnt go the way i pictured it! i married someone who is perfect for me but never would have known it if God didnt hit me upside the head... am having my third child soon and never thought i would have any kids or let alone WANT to have them.... i dont let my insecurities or weaknesses define me like i once did..... and i grow closer to God every day and am thankful for who he has made me to be!

seriously, i dont think anyone but my family can really understand how opposite this is from who i was 10 years ago! its exciting to see how much i have changed and the better perspective on life i now have. i just feel so overwhlemed lately with joy and thankfulness, i just had to share!

Justin and I just got back from meeting with our new midwife. She was spectacular!

when i was pregnant with dahlia i went with a random doctor i chose which turned out to be not a good fit. super quick appointments and i didnt feel understood or listened to at all. one of the midwives on her staff ended up delivering dahlia and i was grateful for that, but overall i didnt like the experience with going with a doctor. 

When i became pregnant with valen we had moved to vancouver so i needed to find a different doctor than before. i heard of a great midwifery from a few different friends and checked it out. they were so fabulous.  everyone in the office was so kind and you really felt they cared about your experience and what you wanted personally. i really enjoiyed going with them. 

but this midwfie is even more what i would have wanted. her office is in her home and this is her passion. she loves helping women having an enjoyable experience all through the process.  not that other people dont have that same idea, but this midwife seems to be an amazing woman and we are both glad to have found her. i think i am more nervous this time around than with my other two pregnancies, but at the same, feel more prepared and in better hands!

we did not get to hear the heartbeat today. we tried to find it, but she said until about 12 weeks it is hard to hear. i was bummed about that, but oh well, we will hear it soon!

these are my second and third attempts at making dolls. the second one(red head) turned out great, but the other one i had a little trouble with. i followed the video tutorial for making the first two, but when i came to the third doll, i ended up making a few adjustments, which i will do next time, but i am stuck right now and really want to finish her! she is for my niece lillian! it was supposed to be a christmas present, but then i didnt get it done by christmas and then the next week i found out i was pregnant and nothing has gotten done since then! the fabric i used for the dress is too flimsy and doesnt hold shape, which is my big problem. i do not want to make an entire new doll , and have already ripped it out several places and it has been re-sewn. but i am just not happy with the dress, but dont know how to save the rest of it. oh and one other problem... the faces. i am nervous to try to paint a face on either one of them. i bought a tiny paint brush and painted a sample piece of fabric to see how it would turn out and it wasnt easy. i thought about painting it before i had sewn it all together, but what if i didnt sew the head straight, she would have a crooked face.... i guess a crooked face is better than no face at all.

the red headed doll dahlia named rosie. after micaiahs sister of course. which is fine, but i think scarlet is better. i had her sitting up on the counter for a while and would let dahlia play with her when valen was sleeping, but one day valen got really excited about her so i let him hold her..... she is his favorite! he loves to snuggle her and for the reason she is a bit mangled. these dolls are definitely not for babies!